Modern Medicine Can't Fix Everything
Update Monday 9/14 6:10 AM:
My dad is still in critical, but stable condition. He had a fever yesterday (gram negative infection in his blood), but the fever has gone down. Per my brother's suggestion, they are using his J-tube (feeding tube in his abdomen) as a drain for the bleeding ulcer. The hope is that this will prevent any further aspiration of blood into his lungs. He is still not stable enough to transport to the Cleveland Clinic.
When I called and spoke to the nurse this AM (yep, called at 4:50 AM) she also mentioned doing a CAT scan today. I think that's a good idea. His blood oxygen level went quite low on Saturday, and if there is damage, we would need to know in order to honor my fathers wishes.
He does have a living will, and gave me medical and durable power of attorney in 1997. So, whatever needs to be done to honor his wishes, I should have the standing to authorize. I spoke with the funeral director from the anatomy department of Case Western Reserve Medical School yesterday to find out exactly what I need to do in order to have my fathers body donated to the school for teaching purposes. Years ago, my dad sent me a newspaper clipping about the body donation program, and made it clear that this is what he wanted to do. I'm going to be calling my dad's primary care physician today, because I think that he may have a form on file that my father signed to authorize this in advance. If not, I can still get it done when the time comes.
There is still a very slim chance that he will pull through, and I am hoping that I won't be making these arrangements, but I was given a job to do, and I am determined to be as prepared as possible to honor everything my father asked me to do. My brother has been very supportive, and everyone is on the same page which makes things MUCH easier.
Thank you to everyone for the kind words, thoughts and prayers.
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Well...a major set back for my father....Just Friday, I spent several hours with him in rehab and he was working VERY hard at his physical therapy. His determination and attitude were admirable. BUT...
At 7 am Saturday morning the rehab center called me. Dad had another GI bleed and was taken by rescue squad to a nearby hospital. He is very critical - It's really bad. He aspirated blood in additional to yet another huge ulcer. It seems as though his body is just not healing itself from the esophagectomy.
When I got to the ER, he was still aware of what was going on. I stroked his head and he knew I was there. He looked right at me and acknowledge me. I was able to lean over and give him a kiss on the forehead. While he was awake, he knew that he wasn't alone.
My dad is still in critical, but stable condition. He had a fever yesterday (gram negative infection in his blood), but the fever has gone down. Per my brother's suggestion, they are using his J-tube (feeding tube in his abdomen) as a drain for the bleeding ulcer. The hope is that this will prevent any further aspiration of blood into his lungs. He is still not stable enough to transport to the Cleveland Clinic.
When I called and spoke to the nurse this AM (yep, called at 4:50 AM) she also mentioned doing a CAT scan today. I think that's a good idea. His blood oxygen level went quite low on Saturday, and if there is damage, we would need to know in order to honor my fathers wishes.
He does have a living will, and gave me medical and durable power of attorney in 1997. So, whatever needs to be done to honor his wishes, I should have the standing to authorize. I spoke with the funeral director from the anatomy department of Case Western Reserve Medical School yesterday to find out exactly what I need to do in order to have my fathers body donated to the school for teaching purposes. Years ago, my dad sent me a newspaper clipping about the body donation program, and made it clear that this is what he wanted to do. I'm going to be calling my dad's primary care physician today, because I think that he may have a form on file that my father signed to authorize this in advance. If not, I can still get it done when the time comes.
There is still a very slim chance that he will pull through, and I am hoping that I won't be making these arrangements, but I was given a job to do, and I am determined to be as prepared as possible to honor everything my father asked me to do. My brother has been very supportive, and everyone is on the same page which makes things MUCH easier.
Thank you to everyone for the kind words, thoughts and prayers.
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Well...a major set back for my father....Just Friday, I spent several hours with him in rehab and he was working VERY hard at his physical therapy. His determination and attitude were admirable. BUT...
At 7 am Saturday morning the rehab center called me. Dad had another GI bleed and was taken by rescue squad to a nearby hospital. He is very critical - It's really bad. He aspirated blood in additional to yet another huge ulcer. It seems as though his body is just not healing itself from the esophagectomy.
When I got to the ER, he was still aware of what was going on. I stroked his head and he knew I was there. He looked right at me and acknowledge me. I was able to lean over and give him a kiss on the forehead. While he was awake, he knew that he wasn't alone.
I believe he knew he was not alone even when he was not awake. On some level he knew you were there.
My thoughts and prayers will be with you in the next few difficult days.
You and your family have certainly been through much in the past few weeks. It is my hope that your path will become easier in the near future.
sincerely,
marky
Praying for you.
I am so sorry to hear about your father's setback. I am glad that he was aware of you when he was awake. Keep talking to him even when you think he doesn't hear you, believe me, he does hear you.
I am praying for you, your Dad, and your family.
Jenny, so sorry to read about your Dad. I'm praying for him and you and your family. God Bless You All.
Kim
Seconding the sentiments of everyone above. Sorry to hear the news.
Please know I'm thinking of you. I do know how hard this is. It's good that he left such specific instructions and someone in charge to be sure they are followed. There is some comfort in that. Take care of yourself, too, it's still a long, hard road.
As an ICU/ER RN, former Visiting Nurse I would encourage you to follow your heart. Consider the quality of life vs. the price to be paid (in pain and suffering, emotional distress etc..).
You know your dad, perhaps better than anyone, which is probably why he chose you to be the DPAH person.
There is no heavier burden to carry than the one you now face.
Find a doctor or nurse you trust and have an honest heart to heart discussion about your dad's future.
My prayers are with you. There is great honor in making the decision to let someone die peacefully. I am certainly not encouraging you to do this, because I am not there to see the reality of the situation. I am strongly telling you it is okay if you need to do it.
If you believe in Heaven as I do, you will find great peace in that. If you do not, you will find a way to get through this difficult time.
My hopes and prayers for you and your fathere are that this will not be necessary.
Sincerely, Marky
Jenny: I am so sorry to hear your father is not doing well. My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family.
I am glad you have a plan in place and the paperwork to back you up. It is even more helpful to have other family members in agreement and supportive.
BetsyV
Jenny,
I would not wish this burden on anyone as we had to make these difficult decisions just last year with Arlyn. Please do not second guess your decisions as we did not. You have to do what your dad would want. Call me if you need to, our prayers and thoughts are with you all,
Debbie
Jenny, My thoughts and prayers are for you and your father. You are a good daughter to honor his wishes. (((Hugs)))
Hi Jenny, I just saw this. My thoughts and prayers are going out to you, your family & your dad!